Lizzie Likes to Talk – “Pilot” ;)

TRANSCRIPTION

Hello, and welcome to Lizzie Likes to Talk.
I’ll get to the why of this, like what the purpose of this even is or you know, even if there is one or not.
But the name comes from, well, my guess is if you’re listening to this right now, at least for a little while,
most listeners probably know me in real life, and I think I don’t even have to explain the title to you then.
But what’s very ironic of that situation, of my talkativeness, is I wasn’t always like that.
In fact, I was the complete opposite, and I was very much usually known as, I’d say, the shy girl around school.
I tend to have this tendency, and I really do think it kind of runs in my family, so it’s hard to control.
It’s just what makes us us, I guess.
I think a lot, which is always a good thing, you want to be thinking.
But I have the problem where I can’t keep those thoughts in my head, I just have to say them out loud.
That gets me in a lot of trouble.
A lot of times there’s things where I’m like, yeah, I probably shouldn’t have to waste that out loud,
or like that will definitely be held against me for the rest of my life.
But, and I am sure most of this and anything I could possibly talk about on this could go to that realm.
And I will inevitably, is that even how you say it?
And especially how I pronounce words, like right there in that instance, will definitely, definitely come back to haunt me in some kind of way.
So I just, I fully expect it. I’m not gonna be shocked.
But we’re just gonna keep on going, and I would like this to be as genuine as possible,
especially in the way that perhaps it can help us all get to know each other on even deeper levels of things that we might have in common that we never knew,
or just things that aren’t normally talked about, because lord knows I can go there.
And not even in the deep kind of conversations, but even just like potentially pointless, but may lead to somewhere you never know.
So discussion tends to create a lot of things, whether it’s solving problems or ideas, or basically you can’t get to a solution if you don’t talk it out.
If you don’t discuss it, and that’s a big huge issue I think that isn’t within our society,
especially when we get to this point where we’re kind of in a standstill of just wanting to avoid the topics altogether.
And so I’ll go there. I will try to go to the tough topics, things that I can relate with, that I can talk with.
I don’t want to just speak about, I’ve been very lucky to know a lot of people that are really amazing humans,
and have gone on to do so many amazing things, even just like the way they live, or their personality,
or there’s so much that I just admire out of the people I’ve known throughout my life,
and I miss so many of them, especially after the pandemic separating me from so many.
But then at the same time as I’ve moved around and life just takes you places, I’ve been very lucky to run into people as well that I’ve missed.
But you can’t do that with everyone, especially when everyone disperses across the whole entire country after post-grad.
And so I always think of the very last scene of the Charlotte’s Web, the second movie, and when all her, oh, spoiler alert, if you care about this,
all of her babies, Charlotte’s, the spider, and it’s only spider I’m okay with, otherwise, oh hell no.
But her babies go all the way around and they make some kind of point of this is life, and we’ll meet each other again if we’re supposed to, or some-ish like that.
But it always makes me sad, and it still makes me sad, but it’s true, especially in the life that we’re living today of digital-ness, or I guess you could just, being a digital native, there you go, terminology.
And even having a possibility to just create our so-called own radio-type situation, or whatever you want to explain a podcast to be,
gives an excuse to have a conversation with people we haven’t in so long, or even get to pick their brains even more than you might have on usual get-togethers or whatever.
But the best thing about it is that I can share it with other people, because there’s so many times when I’m with friends or just family or anything,
and experiencing life where I’m like, you know, if other people heard this very conversation or heard what they went through or heard their perspective,
just imagine what that could do to help them in their lives, or maybe just not help them,
but even if it could just place the steps to get to a point where it creates something new to help anyone, even if it’s myself, then I think that is a success and worth it.
And so why not put it out there? You’ll never know if it has that potential unless you put it out there in the world.
A little disclaimer going into these first episodes. I am just getting used to this whole talking to the public by myself kind of thing.
Just be aware that the first couple ones, you’re going to have to be patient with me, and I will get a lot more confident in my speaking and how to use this mic and all of that stuff.
I’m going to try and transcribe the episode so that there’s at least text of it, but I can’t, like, I’m going to try. Give me a chance to get there.
It’s a lot of work. And I’m also, this is not the only thing I’m doing right now, so I’m trying to find a living, all that fun stuff, and you know, the fun 20s life.
So just be patient with me, be mindful of that going into this. And hopefully we can have fun and learn some stuff together.
I hope I get you thinking and I hope you get me thinking, because that’s how you get to the best ideas and the best change in life.
And that’s what makes this world a better place. So heads up.
This is my first time being this open with the public in a very, very long time. Like, I can tend to be in a pretty open book for the most part.
I just really don’t like being fake. I want to live as genuine of a life as I can, because it’s just not freaking worth the stress of walking on pins and needles.
And it’s just, that’s just not life. Like, what’s the point of life when you’re living like that?
So I know I should be more careful with things I say, and I try to be mindful, especially in the area of stealing ideas and that kind of stuff, because that is a very real issue in the digital era.
So I may be a little mischievous with those kind of topics, but not out of any harm, just so that I can be involved in those projects and don’t miss out on those opportunities because someone else takes it, even though probably other people like inevitably have thought about that before.
But anyways, while we’re on the topic of confidence, just a thought that you’ll kind of hear a little bit about in feature one that I’m honestly quite nervous to post out there.
But it’s a topic on some of the health issues that I went through that I think could be important to other people out there who need to know that they’re not alone and things that can help get them through it since I have gone through quite a few.
And along with that, after the pandemic, and being kind of more closed off and I’ve been social here and there, but not, not even close to how I was in college before the pandemic.
And as you’ll hear and whenever that podcast comes out, my college plans didn’t exactly end how I had planned, and it was quite abrupt and all of my most of my communication was just cut off and something to understand about people with chronic illnesses, or at least me, at least in my experiences and especially in
ones where they get health ailments like I did.
You start to kind of feel like you could infect every single thing that you touch, especially if you actually do have an infection.
And I go into that more in that podcast I’m talking about that hopefully you’ll be brave enough to post out there. I will be.
I’m making it so, because I know that there’s people who were like me going through that and and are looking for someone to actually talk about it especially perhaps around the age they are.
So anyone in young adult age and I feel to believe I’m the only one that’s gone through those at such a young age.
But anyways, I do think it affected my self confidence in some ways of feeling like a menace and literally feeling like anyone around me could or would feel like they could get whatever I’ve been dealing with.
If they
are wrong me.
You start to kind of think of yourself as as gross as the symptoms are, and
how unpleasant it is and just because you are always feeling that inner misery and you forget that, especially with it being an invisible illness as they call it.
Very few people can actually tell that you’re even feeling that way or even going through anything, but it just feels like it’s plastered on your face no matter what, or you’re constantly thinking about like, what if this comes back and like, I don’t want to go out because
this could happen or, and the amount of times that some of the symptoms or like things that you go through gets in the way of like time scheduled things is just, it can be very discouraging.
And so, just keep that in mind around people dealing with chronic illnesses, it’s not going to take away their potential, if anything, it’ll make them even more determined. And that’s another thing that you can get self conscious about is, is people going to not want to give me a chance or, you know, that kind of thing.
Because they know that I have this and etc. All those kind of thoughts really got in my way. Well, and especially just everything I was dealing with. I could barely think about maintaining anything to do with myself and taking care of myself, let alone, you know, relationships and like,
trying my best at friendships, but especially romantic relationships dating. I yeah, that was very secondary. And I can tell now that my timeline is going to be quite different than especially here in the south of all the people moving so fast, whether they should or not.
And no, all my married friends, I’m not calling you out. You know, we all know who those specific ones that are obviously have rushed to fit the timeline are, especially if you’re going to involve kids, it’s very important that you actually know that it is true to yourself.
Not only a good relationship, obviously, yes, and full of love and everything, but also a effective partnership is like you’re picking someone to run a business with you, except the business is your family, which essentially families, family management is a business type thing.
But anyways, there’s a lot of things with family management that tend to be the same as managing businesses too. So yeah, just a little note about me and my life as of, I guess, past 10 years.
And just kind of that. It’s getting better, but I will be continuing to get stronger. So just I ask for your understanding and patience. Thank you.
And please extend that to everyone you know going through something similar, or even if you don’t know that they’re going through something similar because they may not broadcast it, but you’d be surprised.
Also, while we’re on the topic of disclaimers.
If you’ve ever felt like I haven’t been in touch with you, I tried to be in touch as much as I can my like random responses to messages on stories and that kind of stuff that can be weird or whatever.
That’s my way of staying in touch with people and showing like hey you have value.
Basically, if you don’t like it, honestly, I don’t care. So it’s, I do what would feel nice to me. I treat people as I’d like to be treated that kind of thing.
And what I think that there should be more in the world I try to do myself. So, I think that a key thing to make the world, a more accepting and understanding place is to talk more to people, even in those small little exchanges.
And I’m sorry if anything comes off wrong or anything texts tend to do that. But that’s all the communication, we mainly have whenever we’re not in person, all the time.
In this adult life, so just know that if I don’t keep in touch or seem like I’m not it’s not because I don’t want to. And a lot of times, if I’m not texting as much or something like that or reaching out.
It’s because I’ve been trying to, like I am totally fine with being the one that goes out there and setting up the conversations and starting them, especially if I can sense that people are nervous to I started doing that back in high school I, because I was
so nervous but I hated the quiet awkward quietness and like, I just specifically remember a time meeting some of my like extended cousins, and we’re all just you know young preteen girls and none of us wanted to start the conversation but this was like a cool opportunity
to just know, you know we’re all around the same age and then like have the same blood like why not talk and try and find some common things between us so I remember that like even though that is so out of my character, at least back then.
I just went ahead and tried to start the conversations, ask questions. I try really hard to listen to.
And I’m, I need to stop saying I’m sorry, because this is human.
I do feel bad, and I don’t mean to if it ever seems like I’m just talking about myself a lot of times that’s anxiety, or ADHD and I just like genuinely don’t realize it, how about you put some effort into it.
I’m just saying, I understand that there’s circumstances and there’s people who, you know, don’t want to talk to me I guess or don’t want to talk to anybody or anyone or other people or you know sometimes you’re just not a cup of tea for someone.
But the key is is to be living the way that you know yourself to be what your potential is, and what you know could do good for other people. And then if they don’t like it, that sucks for them, because chances are they’re going to get to a place like there’s always
something very interesting because you always want someone to understand but you can’t. If they don’t understand they just don’t understand the way people are wired is how they’re wired. That’s why I like Zodiacs makes me able to kind of understand different ways of understanding, take a shot for every time
you understand, or don’t because that, I don’t really want you dead. That was a lot right there. And speaking of, if you really want to risk your life, play the bachelor drinking game and we like we were just taking sips for every love and like, it was a, it was a doozy.
It was back in like 2016 and I was roommates with a good friend and yeah it was fun night. Anyway, didn’t expect to, I don’t know we didn’t think like they would say love that much like we knew it’d be a lot but anyways, see ADHD.
I always want someone to just understand and like you get so frustrated and it’s a lot of the core of conflicts is like you’re you try and no matter how much you try you tend to like get yourself even more caught up in the web, especially if it’s family, oh my goodness.
And just because you’re raised with someone does not mean that you guys comprehend the same way. That’s why I believe the zodiac signs, so it’s just kind of like I know that it’s not actually 100% factual or maybe not even factual at all, but at least it gets you thinking about the different
ways people can be and presents those questions and that’s what I like about it. Anyways, we can talk about that in another podcast. If you’d like to, even when people, you want them to understand you want to like put your thoughts into their mind is not that easy.
A lot of times when people actually will understand is the hard way. I had a really awesome teacher shout out coach Lewis.
In my senior year of high school. I don’t know but it was no okay.
I was in senior year of high school was dealing with the whole college applications stuff. Back then I didn’t know I had ADHD all of this stuff it would have really been helpful if it was that’s why I advocate so much for mental health and psychology and even having like a mindfulness
class in classes and schools would just be so awesome like a mindfulness class like why not anyways. That’s what bills are for. So, I’ll put that into that work. I won’t talk to her about it right now but I really hope that there’s progress in that because it would have changed my
whole entire life. If I had known how my brain works, and that’s something that so many people don’t understand especially higher education system that people learn in different ways and they communicate in different ways.
And sometimes they don’t even understand it so like you cannot treat them like you they often discipline you in a way of like you aren’t studying the way we want you to study and it’s not like they don’t try I tried so freaking hard, but it caused conflicts
with GPA and it’s not like I didn’t try in high school I just, I gave up because I knew I couldn’t be the student that they were teaching me to be. I could do the complex questionings and critical thinking of like AP and that kind of stuff.
But when it came to testing I just, there’s something I think there’s a dyslexia or something especially with math, like I can, I just split up my freaking medicine dosage, and I don’t, I can’t even explain to you how I did the math for that but I did it.
And that I don’t even know how to explain that to you of like figuring out how much of the percentage it would be for a whole month and having to split that Intel so I don’t waste my medicine and yeah I didn’t do that, but I can’t do the simple sin tan, what was the other one.
Is this sign. I haven’t, I never took calculus I don’t know how I survived without that. Actually I do know I survived without that I don’t think I’ve ever had an instance where I needed that.
But I’m very shocked I got out of school without that.
I literally haven’t taken a math class and
at least six years, I don’t know if I should admit that. But anyways, I love algebra though. Okay, anyways, I love when numbers aren’t actually involved, like literally my math in college was without numbers, so you did the math on that.
Yep, that was a horrible pun. Okay, anyways, I was having a hard time with other students not having that difficulty because there are a lot of times they had older siblings they were like, like a military camp.
And there were a lot of extents of training to, you know, do what colleges wanted from them to get into where they wanted and being in a very intense competitive high school that, you know, you want to be in the top of the top, whatever
our saying was not if you’re going to college, but where, and it really shouldn’t be that way and then as the years went on the saying was not if you’re in college, but if you graduate.
And yep, ding ding ding I was one of those, but that’s a long long story for another time.
That’s important though, but I don’t remember how it got to that I just happened to during lunch one day or something I was like getting help for an assignment or something and I just broke or something.
I can’t even remember how we got to this but, or she was just the kind of person you can talk to you. But Coach Lewis was so awesome she was a basketball coach.
I think she might still be I should really look up how she’s doing, but I’m super cool and understanding and I was talking about how friends just didn’t understand what I was going through and like,
I wish they could, something like that I can’t exactly remember what the exact thing was I just knew. I felt alone and dealing with it, because everyone else had their plans and like five minutes but like, but then at the same time I chose to be more difficult
because I fell in love with OU and I wanted to go there. So, my fault, and I don’t regret it as much as I regret it at the same time. Complicated discussion, but yeah, I was determined to go somewhere I loved, and I connected my intuition felt like that’s where I’m supposed to be.
It ended up everything works out in the end, even when it doesn’t just think that thing through.
And she told me a really
heartfelt story about how
I don’t remember if it was a cousin or something someone was not willing to, when her mom had a health procedure, or something like that. They weren’t willing to go out of their way to help them or something.
And then she told me about the thing the biggest thing though that people don’t realize is if they don’t understand now, chances are the way the world works and I’m pretty sure she said the way God works, is they might not understand now, but they’ll understand and even worse way
later on if they’re not willing to even try to understand now. So don’t worry about that. Karma will solve it and teach them on your own.
I have seen that happen with me and through the years. I have seen that a lot of times, even if you don’t see it happen.
It doesn’t matter as long as it’s happening to them.
And doesn’t matter whether you get the retribution is that the word I’m looking for I don’t know.
The lesson themselves, and that’s what I care about, whether I see it or not. And I have faith that they tend to on some way, at some time.
It might be the next year, it might be 20 years down the line. Her cousin or whoever it was that was involved. Hey Coach Lewis, if you’re listening to this.
Feel free to retell the story to me.
Sadly, her family member went through the same thing. And then at that time she was looking for help.
So she finally understood more personally than watching it on the outside.
And sadly she shouldn’t have had to go through it actually happening. And never do I ever wish that upon people.
But a lot of times the people who are not empathetic that’s karma.
So, karma is very interesting. I was reading about it last night and there’s a lot more broader senses to karma.
Well, we can talk about that in another one.
Remind me, it was, I did not ever think about it to that extent. Let’s just put it that way.
But that karma can have multiple layers to it. Not just like you do a good thing, you get a good thing, that kind of thing.
So, I started this by trying to explain why I don’t reach out of my way.
Hopefully I’ve connected some thoughts here. I can’t even remember.
But I’ve come to realize that being that kind of person that’s okay with going out and doing the hard thing.
Of being the one that steps out of the comfort zone. Because it’s not, I’m not an extrovert. I’m not comfortable with it actually.
I have to be like actually really comfortable with you to really let go.
So I’m surprised how many people can get me there and like the question is if I actually am.
Oh, puppy! My dog just got scared. You okay? Little dashrony.
Oh, puppy. But it shouldn’t be that that’s me all the time.
And at that point people are just taking advantage of you.
I do have enough respect for myself and I’m trying to make sure to put that respect first and not always be the one that reaches out.
So, if you haven’t heard from me in a while, ask yourself, am I usually the one that reaches out?
Are you usually not? Do you take that for granted?
If you actually want me in your life, which I’d love to have you in my life, I’m sure there’s so much I’ve wanted to talk to you about.
And then I’ve just held myself back because I just need to give myself some kind of credit.
I’m not trying to be too ego-ish with it.
So like say I go and visit a place, chances are I probably will still no matter what.
Even if you’ve never even talked to me in a while, drop in and say, hey, I’m here.
Throw my pride to the wind and see if you’d be wanting to hang out because I’ll take the chance while I have it.
You know, YOLO, you don’t always get to see people.
And so if they want to miss that opportunity, that’s on them.
But at least I tried. So I’ll still do that kind of thing.
But talking digitally, that most likely we haven’t talked. That’s why. And it’s not because I don’t want to.
So vote for thoughts. Keep that in mind.
I don’t want to talk about it too much until like it’s cemented, you know, but kind of got more of a confirmation of an exciting opportunity this week.
And even more exciting, it will be crossing my worlds of film and would you call it policy?
I’m going to call it. It’s not really non-profit. Sometimes it’s non-profit.
What the frick are you? Activism. Let’s say that.
My work in activism and I don’t even know if that’s correct. I don’t know. Someone help me.
But activism and film. And so I’m really, really excited.
They’ve gone. They’re being acknowledged with a nomination in the finalists round for TV spots.
So they’re good. And so I’m really, really excited.
And just to learn from them. And they seem like amazing people.
And it’s exactly what I’ve been trying to manifest. We can put it that way.
When really manifesting is me emailing them to see if they have an opening.
Seriously, guys, if you think that that’s too bold, it’s not. You got to be bold.
It’s too competitive out there. If you see something that you want to be involved with, tell them.
There’s someone that you want in your life. Tell them.
God, we just keep trying to like read people’s mind when obviously we’re not doing a good job at it.
And bringing me back to the film life, I was thinking about it and how much like it’s interesting how whenever shows come and find me,
they tend to or maybe it’s just like what I’m into at that time.
Like, there’s definitely nights where I’m like, yeah, I’m not feeling for that dark of a thing.
And then sometimes I’m like, yeah, let’s go completely Southern Gothic and question all about life.
You’re on the cord, puppy.
They my dog sat on the cord.
The microphone. So hold on.
Green this up. No, you’re so cute. It’s OK.
My lord. Wait, is this still working?
Shoot, I don’t know.
He just wants to meet me. So mine censor me dog.
Not like the rest of the world isn’t censoring everyone.
OK, anyway, he’s he’s trying to pull back in the court again.
It’s so interesting how like the different shows within life come together into what’s going on in life and what it would be.
There you go. And like, for example, right now, I’m catching up on the last season of The Good Fight.
Convenient after, you know, diving into the thoughts of someday pursuing law, not like lawyer law, but like learning law.
And yes, being more educated. Luckily, I found ways that you can work with it without even needing the law school and get experience that way.
I don’t know. We’re keeping we’re keeping the path open.
I’ve discovered a really big realization of that.
You know what? Damn it. I’m not going to let these like I have to be doing this by this age.
And that B.S. stop me. Like, I’m going to do it whether I make it at that time or not.
I’m so sick of the confines. I’m pretty sure that’s not how that word is used.
But my dog wants to play making it difficult.
I realized that actually the key to success and how people become the most successful, like if you’ve noticed, like no one’s path is the same.
You can, you know, go up that usual ladder. And sometimes that works, but sometimes it fails altogether anyways.
So like if it doesn’t work for you, it doesn’t work for you.
The key of success is actually being comfortable where you are and being comfortable health wise, you know, mental health wise, everything like where it all fits.
And obviously, that’s really hard to figure out.
But the best way to really figure that out is to perhaps just one, meditate like it’s easier said than done.
Think it through. Ask yourself, feel the moment, be in the present and ask yourself what works right now.
What of this plan can I do right now? What fits right now?
Like if I want to be in a different town, well, obviously can’t do that right now.
So what can I do towards that right now, but still be able to enjoy right now?
And I don’t know if I’m explaining that correct, but where you are, what you can enjoy out of life at that very moment,
see what you can take from it and transform your path that way.
If something that was your goal doesn’t fit there, maybe it’s not meant to fit there.
Is there a way that you can compromise with life and get some of that at the same time?
I’m definitely not one of those of like, oh, yeah, like just settle. Definitely don’t settle.
I’m very against the settling thing.
The core of what I’m saying is trust your intuition.
If you feel like you’re lacking something, really try to dive into your mind mentally and to figure out what you think that is.
Don’t try to substance abuse and other things that take you away from it that can hurt your body and the mind in the meantime.
That to the point where you actually figure things out, you have to deal with helping your health or something like that.
I don’t know how to explain it.
Let’s just continue this topic another time.
And hopefully some lovely people will comment on it in whatever community I create and can help me put words to this.
Hopefully I can put you on the path of an idea, a way to make it more than just the freaking usual timeline shit.
That’s such a BS. It’s worth the cuss word.
Are you playful? Are you playful, doggy?
You little doggy, playful.
Hmm, daisy boy.
I was trying to say a second ago is being a film major, if you want to talk movies and TV shows, I gotcha.
So yeah, getting some suggestions.
I’m sure I’ve probably seen it.
People think I make this as an excuse, but it’s like 100% not.
I really do think that having it on in the background, especially ones that are like, you don’t really have to focus on as much like reality TV shows, helps me focus.
Because then, sad, but then I’m not thinking of all the anxious thoughts in my head at least.
Because if it’s totally quiet, that will drive me mad.
Cue to car radio.
And oh boy, if you want to talk the good fight, I don’t even know where to start with that.
I’ll definitely be hitting up the Reddit and reading what people’s thoughts are because it’s surrealism.
So you’re not supposed to take it fully seriously. It brings you to like thoughts that are you, it’s, I don’t know, scary.
Okay, I’m done with that topic for now.
TTYO.
And one of the biggest things that gives me a lot of anxiety and I explained, I’ve already started recording a few, especially whenever something was on my mind.
It’s kind of been more of a self-help type thing.
Like, I guess a diary of sorta, but not really just spewing thoughts, whether that should happen or not.
It’s been happening and I’ll probably post them just because there’s so many times when, you know, let’s go throwback for a minute.
Back in the Tumblr days in high school, I loved Tumblr because, and if you’ve ever been on there, especially if you were nerd like me and loved the fangirling type side,
which I would like to put a disclaimer right here and say that everybody has at least one fangirling side of something.
I just, there’s just no way. I highly doubt it. That’s just living.
Anyways, if you don’t, if you did avoid that type of life, then you’re really missing out, dude.
Stories are amazing and you’ll come to see that a lot of my things that I can talk about or connect ideas of revolves around storytelling.
In fact, doing this is a type of storytelling per se.
And because no matter what, like if you want to like just throw a word on me of what I am, the number one thing I would think could describe me a storyteller,
especially my ability to talk a lot.
And I’ve had quite a few people even tell me of like maybe probably most likely just to get it out of my system so that I don’t spew it all on them and make their lives a little bit quieter.
But have told me of like you should film videos again like I did once upon a time.
We can talk about that someday. Not right now.
And or create podcast or whatever. And like, like you definitely are able to talk and do that.
So here we are. It definitely had crossed my mind.
And it’s been a while in the making. But we’re here and I’m finally doing it.
And even though it like, for example, it’s 4 in the frickin morning and I’ve decided that now is when I’m recording this intro.
But when it comes time that you can do it, then you do it.
That’s basically what you’re losing me back to the anxiety thing of there’s been so many different thoughts of like things that I probably would have posted back in the day of Tumblr of just to see, you know, just get it out there.
And especially great Tumblr was especially great, except for the times if anyone used it incorrectly, which I do not advise or support.
But I’m just a little disclaimer there because I definitely know that’s possible.
And there were some graphic things on there here and there, but I wasn’t really part of that side of Tumblr.
And but what was awesome is it really was great outlet and maybe still is.
I don’t really know if I hope it’s still being used. It was really great, especially for creatives.
But for teenagers who have so much going on, so much transition, so much to think about and everything seem like you have to think it all out right then and there and make decision for your whole frickin life before you even know what’s anything about life.
Really, you really don’t like even going into my 20s and or actually don’t even want to think about it.
But starting to go into my 30s and because I’m 26 right now, I got some time, but we’re getting there.
And so I mean, I’m like remembering when I thought it was crazy whenever people would post about, oh, I just moved into college.
Anyways, and thought, wow, that’s such a big change.
And now we’re like double over. I don’t want to think about it.
Anyways, we’re gonna. Yeah, just put that in a file. Keep moving.
So this is kind of also because I learned the hard way in a lot of different things pertaining to I’d say young adult life, teenage life, anything.
And I mean, there’s no way not to learn the hard way it happens.
But if I can give some advice to make it a little bit easier for people going through it right now, I’d love to do that, too.
So, if you know people in those kind of stages of life or feel free to pass along, and I’m sure I will give plenty of different scenarios that hopefully they may avoid or might help them to find something that would help them.
I don’t know.
Number one thing is, don’t think you’re just gonna be able to just pay off any freaking debt. OK, go to school based on not being in debt for the rest of your life.
I know that seems like a simple thing, but when you’re 17, let just trust me, it’s not, especially if you grew up in a bubble.
Anyways, let’s top it for another time.
And the hard thing is, is I still believe it’ll happen for a reason. And that’s another that surprisingly doesn’t seem like a deep topic, but actually could be a deep topic because of the way I’ve kind of touched on this on like one that I’ve already recorded that I would love to go even deeper.
It’s very, essentially, there is some philosophers type thought is that that’s just a bandaid to us having to think deeper into what could be possibilities of maybe there isn’t something beyond that kind of thing.
I tend to be a very spiritual person, because I’ve had experiences and just, I’m very glad that especially with the amount of depression and different mental elements I’ve had in my life that I’ve been able to stay quite positive for the most part, even though people who know me definitely know I can go negative way too easily and I really don’t love that.
And I try to avoid it myself shocking to people that know me, but because they might be like really don’t seem like it but I am I actually I’m trying.
But, you know, some moments are better than others.
And that goes back to the different experiences I’ve had.
That’s a big part of my life is that I have an autoimmune disease, and a lot of them are connected to that, whether I realized it or not.
Especially all the mental stuff which, if you’ve caught on yet, I have ADHD. So I kind of popcorn. You remember that that phrase back in school, like from topic to topic and not like I’m trying not trying, trying to keep it coercive, but in actually in my brain it is all connected and you’d be so surprised like, especially if I go quiet for a while.
And then I just bring up something, you’d be surprised it actually is connected to whatever the heck we talked about at some point.
It’s an interesting roadmap. And so, yeah, one of the things that I have is ADHD, then I have anxiety.
And part of the biggest part of that anxiety is OCD. I love that one. It’s one of my favorites.
And depression has probably been my longest one. And then, I mean anxiety too, but it was kind of there before I really realized it. I mean all of them, you know what I mean.
So, and surprise surprise, they all tend to be connected together, but they kind of feed off each other. So if you’re not helping one, it’s like, how can you do that?
I’d like to refer to my favorite meme of these rainbow balls falling down into a, I don’t know, sorter thing. And then it’s like a complete mess until they somehow happen to sort each other by color as they fall down.
And it’s like something, the meme says something like, when you’re going through the chaos of life, but God always has a plan.
Hopefully that gives you a sense of where I was going with this topic.
So I’d love to go into mental health. That’s a huge part of my life and a big thing that needs to be talked about. It needs to be, it’s a part of everyone’s life, whether they realize it or not.
It really ruins life, especially the people who are avoiding it by not facing it and facing the different things that like our intuition when we know that we should, we’re capable of better things. Like I definitely have had that quite often of that.
I’m not putting my full potential, but you know, roadblocks, especially when your health is involved. They got to get stronger. That’s what I’m working on and what it could be and not even to try to compare other people’s lives, but to learn off of it.
And I definitely, that was probably one of the best parts and advantages of college is getting out of that bubble, helping around thousands of people. Well, if you go to a four year or I don’t know, is there a big community colleges?
Is there such a thing that works too? But whatever. If just get out of your comfort zone, be safe, but get out of your comfort zone and meet people who didn’t live the life you did.
Or and half the best part is whenever you and I found this out also when I was in religion classes that as you learn, the more you learn about different religions and different thoughts, different lives.
You see how much they actually cross over and it’s a very beautiful thing to witness and then you learn off of that and you can relate it to your own life. And that’s what I hope this podcast brings, especially introducing some of my friends.
So for example, this episode is just me and I’ll have moments of that. Sometimes it’s easier for me to navigate. I’m new to this whole directing by just a voice and it’s kind of more like live broadcasting, which I’ve actually have some experience in back in college.
But you know, not a pro. So it’s an especially after the whole pandemic break. It’s been a bit so I’m getting used to it. But I filmed one with some really amazing friends of mine named Cherish and Sierra.
That was really fun. I happen to know each of them individually, but then they knew each other already and so I thought it would be fun to bring them together and it was and it was a great. I made me miss OU a lot.
I went to University of Oklahoma. Definitely talk about that. I live in Texas and definitely talk about that. Lots of messes here. I worked for that OU Works campaign actually got some insight into that life and what we need to work on.
I’m definitely in the process of trying to get another job and hopefully in a way where I can use some of the things that I witnessed needs to be worked on.
That would be the best, but I don’t know. Just seeing where life goes and takes me. So that will definitely probably come up. Fun unemployment life and even more fun when you have an autoimmune disease, not having insurance and how fricking cruel that is to have it
I’m going to do jobs, but the biggest thing is I want this to be an open decorum and open discussion. Of course, it’s kind of hard when it’s a podcast and you’re just listening, but I’m going to try to create either like a discourse or is it called discord.
I sound like such a new but do people even say that word anymore. I don’t know. I do all the time. But anyways, that’s how you can tell I was on Tumblr back in the day.
So I’m going to some kind of forum and I’d love for you to come on hop over there.
If there’s anything that strikes a thought in your mind, or if you hadn’t have wisdom on anything I talk about.
This is not just to give out to you like I thought about calling it Lindsay lessons, and I may have like little segments of that here and there because I do know weird things I have apparently have Gemini mostly in my chart and we tend to pick up on weird facts random facts
and it’s kind of handy and it also doesn’t. But in this case, maybe, but I don’t present it in like I absolutely know there’s some things I’ve learned, I’ll give myself credit in that sense.
There’s definitely so much more to learn and I’m 100% self aware of that and self awareness is very very very important to me and then just it should be to everyone. But anyways, another topic for another time.
And so I’d love to learn off of you guys too. And then hopefully anyone else listening could learn from that too or just who knows where the conversation can take us I find that very fascinating.
And I want to learn more from everybody. And there’s definitely places in my life in like being on my own, and not being in around people all the time like I was back in college, a lot less often I’m just, it feels like I’m just treading water by myself and I do a lot of research.
I look into almost obsessively, again I have OCD so, trying to figure out solutions. And so I do know biology things here and there of what could be creating or what could be causing it, what could be connecting things.
You guys all probably have lived something that could help me in maybe situations that I’m going through, or, or just simply tell me or maybe me expressing it tells you, you’re not alone, and that can make such a difference.
And that’s what, oh my god, this will happen often and I’m so sorry. I’m probably going to try to like, use editing to my advantage of that and like, you’ll never know. But I’m so sorry if this makes you like lose face.
And because I know there’s some people who are like, oh my god like I can’t rely on anything in life like sometimes when they learn some of the tricks and broadcasting. And it’s hilarious to me how often people think like everything is scripted and broadcasting, but it’s because it’s really not
they give like way too much credit like you really think that everyone would put that much work into it like they’re not superhuman. They try, but they’re not. So it’s very funny to me like I get into like so many arguments with my sister over it of like, she’s like oh no that’s
so I don’t know why you take it so seriously and it’s like because some of it is real. Some of it is like nudge most of it’s nudged, if anything, but like to be scripted they’d actually have to be good actors and most of those people especially reality TV shows are not, they aren’t.
They try, like they legit try to become actors there’s here and there like, I mean she was an actor first, but like like Rochelle Strauss, surprisingly, instantly like she hasn’t been acting a lot I mean unless you want to count Sunset as being kind of acting, but I’d like to bleed not.
Anyways, because I identify a lot with her cancerness. And so, I’m not saying that in the negative way that is a zodiac way love having that be what it’s called our sign is great.
So I popped right back into acting again into an upcoming lifetime. Yep, I’m a lifetime launcher, of course. And so you know you’ll probably hear here and there is some true crime random and that’s probably why I’m scared of so much of life, but I feel like I need to be prepared.
I don’t know if that’s really preparing me much, but so there’s an upcoming lifetime movie she’s in, and I’m pretty shocked just even from the previous that she looks like she’s doing a really good job.
And so, like just to jump straight in there not to doubt her skills or anything just it’s you become rusty, and I have act and working on that anyways we’ll talk about that another time.
And so, yeah, I’m in a weird situation where I’m somehow trying to combine a life in film and storytelling and creating all that fun stuff and policy making type.
I like to sum it up with anti corruption, because I’d be happy going nonprofit way. And then with sometimes I think like, what I want to get done and can only happen through policy whether I like it or not. And so we shall see.
We’ll definitely talk about some of those situations and fun times in life. And those are the actually the most important whether we like it or not, you can pretend like you don’t want to be a part of politics and believe me, I looked up a lot of y’all’s voting records, and I know how many people are avoiding it, even some who pretend like they’re not, and you know you and I both know you do not vote.
And that’s why we’re in this position. Okay, okay. Anyways, little prep talk right there. And I actually was right there to like I always avoided it like a sword.
That I was about to say some kind of phrase but I don’t like it.
I don’t think that’s what it.
Okay, scratch scratch scratch that.
Oh my god, I just realized that while I was talking about ADHD, I had a moment.
So what I was saying is that like, even though it’s one of those alarmingly fake things.
When you find out that a family tree might be completely just watch outlander, and you’ll see how much can be fabricated within your family tree and what is and what is not documented and really, yes it’s fictional, I know that okay I know.
But it’d be really fun if not, not to have their life but the possibilities. Anyways.
But it makes you start thinking about it and then if you keep talking with your family and doing some research.
They’re not too far off the mark it ain’t all fiction, let’s just say that it’s based off of really true things.
Yeah, and then it made me realize like, I love genealogy I love the potential of it.
Probably we’ll talk some about that too.
It’s literally solving crimes and also reuniting people it’s just, it’s so cool.
I just found out that actually there’s a genealogy lab somewhere near me where I happen to be living and never thought I would end up living here, and happens to be a really big one that I think is connected to a lot of different cases, and kind of thought about maybe even interning there because why not.
But I don’t know. It’s every.
I’m in the Houston area and let’s just say it ain’t easy route to get to one place to the other, but it’s big.
So, I don’t know if I have the energy but we shall see.
So things like that. But yeah, a lot of it is not what it seems. And so that will kind of be possibly what my podcast will be, because I will try to edit things to kind of actually make them connect, or at least more than it was.
And I wish I could do that in real life.
But I can’t. A lot of times I’m kind of using.
I know most of you already know this probably, but I’ll send you a text later on and be like, Oh, I remember what I was saying and finish the points because it will drive me nuts if I don’t.
And I’m usually making mental notes as I’m going with like, Oh, to not finish that topic and then I kind of way of is worth it or not, should I.
And then, yeah, go off of that. But sometimes it bothers me too much I have to.
So, anyways, that’s anxiety.
Number one thing I’d love to give tips to.
And the number one tip for anything mental is what really helps is to educate yourself on what the different things can cause.
And so that you can pinpoint what’s going on, and that can kind of ground you at least to figure out, you know, like, I know that if it bothers me, I can’t I have to tell someone it or got to get it off my brain right then anxiety.
And then dig deeper into like, why?
That’s where it gets more complicated, but we can learn together.
And then more random thoughts of, did I ever complete the Tumblr thought?
If I didn’t, this is what Discord will also be for or forum, whatever it is going to be.
Yeah.
But yeah, if you can tell, or if you just know me.
I tend to speak a lot. And especially when I’m saying everything I’m thinking, whether it should or not.
Let’s just say a guess a word to put it is, it took a lot of evolving to get there.
It’s one of my favorite words, but
lots of learning, lots of ups and downs, lots of pushing myself out of my comfort zone.
And then to the point where I can’t stop. Not sure how I feel about that.
It comes in handy, but sometimes and sometimes I’m like, yeah, did I really do that? Yes. Yes. I yes I did.
Go out and
reach out to people that I’m like, yeah, but did I should I have? I don’t know.
This squeaky wheel. Oh my God.
I brought this up with Sierra and Cherish and they helped me. They finished the phrase for me.
And the biggest irony of it is that I was the shy girl before I’d say college.
And I think I started to kind of go out of the bubble, like push myself a little bit here and there, like around senior year of high school.
But really had to push myself in college.
And because I didn’t go Greek and I had to and OU is very heavily Greek in
or at least in a way of like you don’t need to. Luckily, there are some colleges where
it’s actually quite disappointing to me of like how
how much they don’t interact with each other like the Greek and non Greek.
And there were some of that, especially as freshmen. But then like as they get older, they realize how freaking high school that is.
And if you didn’t, then you just never left high school, hon. And that’s just not a fun life to live in.
I’m just telling you, get out of it. It’s not worth it.
I mean, if you like drama, OK, cool. But that’s what reality shows are for.
Anyways, there are some colleges that don’t need names, but maybe we’re thinking the same.
And where it’s just it’s sad to me because there’s so many things that
because I was friends with people who were Greek and I got to experience the Greek life that way,
probably for even better than that to pay the dues.
Kind of best both worlds in the end, I was about to say, hazing. And that’s a here and there thing.
I do know it exists, whether you want to say that or not, suck it up. We all know exists.
So that really gets me mad whenever people try to act like it’s not.
And it’s like we both know. So hush. And especially if it gets dangerous, not OK.
It just it’s it’s not worth risking your life. OK, no, it’s not something definitely needs to be talked about.
And that just no one will ever bring it up because, yes, it can help with bonding.
But if there’s a line, there is a line. If life’s are being lost to it.
OK, anyways, that’s a deep one for another time.
And if there’s any topics you feel like you’d like to chime in on or you have some knowledge on or just anything or stories
and or something you’re interested in talking about, let me know.
And I’d love to talk to you and invite you on here and or even just tell me your thoughts and I can read it.
Or if you don’t feel comfortable being on here with me, that’s it’s all good and good.
But anyway, so then also being in the non-Greek life of like, you know, people tend to be more working.
I’m not saying that everyone in Greek doesn’t work because at the same time,
there were definitely some people who had to work for the dues and things like that.
It’s I would love to talk about the pros and cons of Greek life sometime because I love it to be more for what it’s supposed to be.
But there is definitely times when and I know it’s done so much good for so many people that I love.
So this is where it gets into a difficult topic. That’s why, honestly, it’s really interesting to me.
So and it’s important to make it even better and make it something that more people can enjoy and have a good experience with.
Because I’ve heard some things. It just breaks my heart because it shouldn’t be that way.
Not everyone. And I really that was a big difference in why I really think that it benefits to.
Yes, it’s great to be able to have the classes all that from like from freshman year on and grow in that way.
But it makes such you can make such a different choice and you just have more of a one up or anything like people can get to know each other based off of more than just the freaking stats.
And like my high school stats was not my college stats. My potential in high school was very different than college.
And so one, I think that’s actually just stupid to to on their part to base it off of just of the same with colleges.
That’s what’s wrong in so many different things. Basing someone’s potential just off of that.
And because you don’t know what’s going on in their life, that’s why the interview process is very important.
And the truth of Greek life is a lot of times and it’s very important for young girls, especially who take it really hard.
Guys do too, actually, to know that a lot of times it’s already decided by the time that you go into that house.
Guys work so very differently, especially like it seems more networking and girls can have that.
But anyways, I knew a lot of people in the higher ranks of them and learned a lot from them, but also still don’t know everything, of course.
So would be very interesting if anyone could talk.
I know that I’m sure that there’s some things they’re, you know, worried to cross lines of.
And I understand that. But that’s kind of what gives me.
An ability to talk about these different things because I don’t really have that only maybe make some people mad, but oh well.
So if it can improve life’s then you know what? Suck it up, buttercup.
We should talk about it. But yeah, what was good is that, oh, you did have a lot of the Greek life thing.
I had to push myself or I would have lived such a lonely life.
There’s sadly a lot of depression and it’s understandable because it’s such a big transition.
So you’ve got to be on top of that. I went through quite a depressive stage in my freshman year.
And luckily, because of my amazing guidance counselor, Alicia, I love her.
I still talk to her on Facebook and shout out to my high school counselor, too, because.
They made such a difference and I still talk to them all the time, honestly.
They we should really use that more and.
Let’s talk about the the fight to get more mental health into schools, especially on a primary level.
But so then. She recommended I go for an orientation camp and we discussed that.
And my episode with. Cherish, so you’ll have to go listen to that if you want to.
And yeah, all of that fun stuff and that.
Was so amazing because it was.
Greek and non-Greek people, and it was the best part is that we couldn’t really even talk about it with the campers, the incoming freshmen.
And so you never really fully knew unless you like.
Had the time and you have to actually have the energy to stalk people online in between your days if you didn’t beforehand to even know.
And so it was pretty hilarious because you like could probably fake it for the most part and like never know if they actually were in Greek life or not, because it just it didn’t matter.
And you’ve got to know people for who they were.
And that was the important thing. And then that’s how it like those different kind of parts of life crossed over a lot for me.
And it just makes me sad for like the colleges that don’t cross over like that, but don’t.
Mix them all together like I don’t think Greek life is completely bad.
I don’t, but I do think it can be a business that takes over and manipulates like a lot of capitalistic things in our society.
But again, topics for some other time.
Why I’m pursuing anti-corruption to make those things not so that they have to go away.
No, I there’s advantages to but.
Actually fair. Yeah, yeah, that’s that’s it.
So not, you know, taking away parts, taking away more than it’s getting.
We’ll put it that way. So, oh yeah, long story short.
It wasn’t until I really had to force myself to get out there and to.
And like when you and all of those kind of opportunities were interview opportunities, and it was good timing anyways, because you’re about to go into the job field.
And Lord knows you got to get good at an interview. And I started getting so involved that interviews were like easy.
And I kind of miss that because now being back in the unemployment life, I get like so anxiety just comes back, even though I know I can do it.
So I wish I could just go back to that. Oh, it’s just another interview, whatever.
I’m but I don’t feel that yet. I try to get back into that mind space whenever I have an interview to help my anxiety.
But the thing that a lot of people who don’t have anxiety or even people who do have anxiety sometimes forget this anxiety.
It can be like it can be just a physical thing that takes over.
And so you think that there has to be a trigger and there are triggers, but you might not even know.
And so like all the time, whenever I’m like I’m feeling really anxious, my mom will be like, are you behind in school?
Are you like what’s happening? You know, worried mother syndrome.
And I’m like, OK, I don’t know. I’m just anxious.
And I could be simply something like I didn’t eat or didn’t get enough blood sugars off or, you know, could actually be a health ailment.
Or it is something like I totally missed a fricking exam thing back in the day. So. Yeah.
And that’s the beauty of this. This is just the beginning. Don’t have to stuff all of it into one.
This is just a taste. Hopefully you even got this far because I didn’t mean to like touch on so many things.
We’ll touch on other topics, too, to give you a taste. For example, today was the Super Bowl.
It’s a mere number. I always say fricking near numbers. Anyways, that’s another thing we can talk about if you’d like to.
If you don’t know what that means. You can Google in the time being.
It’s a you might think I’m crazy. Maybe not. I don’t know.
If you know what it is, that would be a fun thing to realize we have something in common.
Because no one not everyone talk about those kind of spirituality things.
I can have spirituality with Christianity and but at the same time, I think that it’s just like I mentioned about learning from different religions that it’s very possible.
Like it’s couldn’t be the same idea and just said in a different way. So I relate to all of those.
I find so many things like in Hinduism and Buddhism, like karma, like how so many people talk about karma without even realizing they’re talking from that’s actually a religious policy of, you know, yeah, like things like that.
And yoga, they don’t realize that that is part of a religion and or at least originally.
And basically, if it helps you, then awesome. If it’s safe and not a cult. Okay, which that’s another fun, deep topic.
If you’d like to go there is religion inherently a cult? Is that good or bad?
I’ve had that moment where I’m like, wait a minute.
Yeah, is being interested in science automatically a bad sign to potentially being a serial killer?
Have you ever thought about that? Maybe I watched too many documentaries.
So I have anyways. How do you divert that into not being a serial killer and just helping science?
Oh, I just that gave me chills. I don’t want to think about that. I watch a lot of criminal lines. Oh, mine hunter. Go watch mine hunter.
I tend to watch a lot of things since, you know, film is a passion of mine.
So I can give you quite a few things to soak up your life. And I’d like to I was about to say waste life.
But there’s so many things I’ve actually learned from and that have generally helped my life.
And that’s why I love it so much. So we can talk about how ironically of all things, Lucifer, the show Lucifer on Netflix, highly recommend.
I know that there’s definitely some shouting blasphemy at this very second.
But I promise you, it’s actually part of the irony.
Like it actually might be one of the most Christian shows I’ve ever seen. Like, I know, I know. We got to talk about this.
That’s why this is here. We I can’t explain it until you watch it and then we can talk about it.
I’ll probably have some episodes that are spoilery. And so we can discuss things.
But I watched Lucifer around this time last year and where it was like the fall of last year.
But when I was kind of had an existential crisis type moment, lost too many people in my life.
Even then, I’ve been lucky. It wasn’t even more personal. It was it was definitely still personal.
But we can go into there if you’d like to. I know that’s probably really tough topic for many people, especially my loved ones that went through all that.
But anyways, we’re not. I will try to give warnings as much as possible so that, you know, trigger ways.
But then if it can, if you can push yourself through it, maybe actually hearing of the topic and pushing it could help you open your mind.
Like sometimes I would avoid topics that are like spirituality, especially being younger and like like politics where I just it was just so broad.
I didn’t want to understand it, but it’s happening all around you anyways. So you might as well.
To see if it can open your mind and help you. And so I finally launched Lucifer and didn’t expect it, like didn’t think it was just looked funny.
And it was it is really funny. There are the characters. Just amazing. But anyways.
And it actually had so many broad ideas that got me thinking of all the possibilities that could be out there that we just don’t even go there.
And I had like, how didn’t I think that, like, maybe God’s even learning like and I know that that could maybe.
Put him down in the sense of he’s, you know, all powerful that again, this is a discussion I’d love to have like.
But to think that having forgiveness for all and doesn’t that include the fallen and which comes into our life and then just also helped me.
Open up my mind more to like.
Like lost a family friend that before he got to 21.
And just thinking like how amazing of family man he could be.
And then who’s to say I’d love to think that people who lost their life early.
Maybe their soulmates aren’t on earth.
And it was time for them to reunite with it. And if you notice, tends to be the ultimately good that go.
Why is that? And that’s one of the hard things and bring there we go.
How about this? Let’s end this one on that.
That the everything happens for a reason. I sometimes have this guilty feeling where I do believe it and things that I’ve gone through.
And even like things I will go through, I’m sure there’s so much of like timing is fascinating.
Let’s just put it that way. And how we cross paths and especially in this day and era where I mean for heck’s sake.
I’ll cut some one thing and then I’ll say heck instead of hell.
But anyways, Megan Markle and Prince Harry met on Instagram, of all things.
Like that’s how the royal. They’re that. Yeah.
Something like the institution of royalty.
I’m sure that can get into a not a very like unnecessarily tense conversation.
But I have lots of thoughts on them, too, actually.
And fairness and how it actually goes back into conservatism. It’s very interesting.
A lot of the things going on in our world goes back to change and privilege. And yeah, I’ll just leave that for you to connect until we talk about that sometime.
But yeah, they met on the frickin Instagram.
And so you just never know of all the things like really, that’s how someone becomes part of a royal family.
And so things are like even people who have kids with, I mean, JLo and Aflac, right?
I don’t even I still sometimes go back and forth on that whole situation.
But if they’re happy, they’re happy. I try to stay out of celebrity couples because you don’t actually fully know they’re real people.
I try to remind myself it’s not like a TV show where you can know the ins and outs.
And even then you don’t actually fully because if it’s smart creator, they’re leaving things out just wink, wink, like, you know, you and things like that.
But then I’m like six months. Yeah.
Finally watched that and it was very different than what I expected. I thought it was going to be like horror movie.
It was sad. Anyways, speaking of spirituality.
But yeah, it was it’s the Super Bowl today and like just realized we’ll talk about I tend to probably the film and me also a lot of cultural things and, you know, pop culture topics.
Like, I finally realized why we honest. I think that she could have done so much better for herself in the day.
The performance was really amazing in the sense of like giving the people their show.
I’m really glad they did that. Amazing what she did of being pregnant and how she was the first pregnant woman to do that or pregnant anything, I guess you could say.
And those kind of things.
And I’m glad she didn’t like risk herself that kind of thing. But like even in sense of I realized it’s mainly because that’s a one and it’s usually a once in a lifetime opportunity.
And it should be about telling the story of your career. And I couldn’t see that as much.
And I was glad of like, you know, it’s nice to especially for the minimalistic south there. They probably loved it of getting rid of the gimmicks and just making about her and just her career and her talent.
But I think that at the same time, it identifies what goes into your talent to bring the people who were part of your story, just like how Dre did.
I don’t think each of the songs that he did last year, like when they brought up Eminem and Missy Elliott and all the people he helped build clear and vice versa.
It didn’t take away from his talent. It didn’t take away like all of those songs were him. It was his successes. But it was a way to show how everything connected and how it elevated hip hop as a whole and just a bigger statement beyond it.
And Rihanna, like if you read her interviews, she knows the bigger purposes within it, like how she wants to represent for her son and how she couldn’t have done it earlier and she didn’t agree with where NFL was going.
And there’s so many big important discussions or like points that she could have made in her music without even going too controversial.
Just even with choices of like lighting and things like that, like didn’t even have to change that much. But I wish it had incorporated more of that.
And, you know, like we all know like whether you like to admit it or not, which I think isn’t fair if you don’t want to admit that. But people helped you along the way.
So like I was very surprised Jay-Z didn’t come out. And if you know her story, he was there and maybe he didn’t want to. I don’t know.
They have a really interesting history, especially with Beyonce. But anyways, go look that up for yourself.
And it’s really cool her and Asa Brockie’s relationship actually. And I feel so bad that I fell for the rumors that someone started online that they weren’t that there wasn’t there or whatever.
And but actually they were friends for a very long time and then just never expected it or like each person was constantly in a relationship.
And then they just realized that they vibed and happier than ever. That seems so actually that’s what happened to Halsey too.
Go look up her story. And it’s really cool because her song, So Good, seems like a sad story, but it’s actually the opposite. And go look it up.
I don’t want to keep this going as much. So I’ll just sprinkle some things to look into.
But I wish that I really like how Beyonce did that with hers. Bringing Destiny’s Childs. That was such a big part of her story.
I think she did it in the middle of her performance and if she didn’t, that’s how I would do it.
Make it so that you don’t know if it’s actually going to happen. And that’s what I was expecting because maybe because so many other people did that.
So I liked it’s refreshing having something different, but like you’re so used to, you know, others coming into it that it makes it subconsciously dull.
And she’s so much more than that. And so that’s what I think made me feel disappointed in it in a way.
Like, you know, like she has her own brand, like didn’t even like even if it was things like newspapers showing all her successes or like that she’s made herself into a millionaire based off of her own artistries.
And she’s like even she hasn’t performed like things that like people that were there probably didn’t know like could have somehow hinted like she hasn’t performed in six years that made that so much more amazing.
So little tidbits like that like you have to go find it, but maybe she’s happy with it that you don’t know that unless you go find it. It just doesn’t show the potential that I know that was actually in the performance and what brought her there like that kind of thing.
You know, surprise there wasn’t even a shout out to Barbados or things going on there because I know she deeply cares about that.
That kind of thing. So interesting talking about that and then like other things of even talking about.
I realized that like Selena Gomez would be a cool one. And then I just realized because I just randomly had kiss me through the phone of all songs, all songs like such ancient song.
And I realized yeah Justin Bieber would definitely be entertaining too. And then I realized even though I like to keep out of it. Wouldn’t that be one heck of a super welcome.
Yeah, Selena and Justin.
I also hate to put that onto them but oh man that would be awesome.
I kind of like the drama, but also because it just really does feel like and I really believe that if there is unsettled business, especially in relationships, it will always linger there and cause issues.
So listen to your intuition you I really don’t think Justin did.
And not to say anything bad about Haley and that stuff. I just I think it’s there’s just three months. Okay, three months anyways. Go look up their story to.
I won’t cause any more drama into that. But those are fun conversations we can have.
Oh, but then with the everything happens for a reason thing.
I can’t explain the hard things like
Tyree being such an amazing human he was young dad, very young son.
So many great stories about him, and then the people left over the ones that harmed him I’m sure they don’t have great histories.
Or if they did, what led them to this.
That kind of thing.
It’s a topic I’d love to dive into deeper that’s really hard and
I know that there’s people in my life that I know have gone through really tough things where I feel guilty saying everything happens for a reason because I can’t explain that.
And if I can, I think it takes like if it if.
And I don’t even want to go there because I hate the thought of it of like bad things being part of that.
You know, because if wouldn’t it all have to be a part of it if everything happened for a reason.
Who for thought. I’m like genuinely asking this. I don’t actually know. Of course.
That’s the coolest thing is that we’ll never know. Coolest thing.
Most frustrating thing. Fact of life that people need to acknowledge more and would probably make life easier.
And less conflict.
That there’s so much that we don’t. Doctors pretend like they know so much thing when you like actually become an adult.
It’s almost horrifying when you realize that like they’re still learning too because everybody’s learning human nature.
It’s just it’s life. There’s so much we won’t know.
And being OCD that really sucks.
Like I get over it. Not all knowing. And honestly, if you really think about it, it would kind of suck being all knowing.
Feels like a headache. Sounds like a headache to me. But then.
But also like thinking of at least I believe based on science that everything has an answer out there, whether we will know it or not.
And so that’s kind of my grounding thoughts of there is an answer. There is truth.
There is a definite answer to this.
But the hard part is we might not know.
Especially during this lifetime.
Some interesting foods for thought. I’m sure you didn’t want to go there tonight.
And but congrats. I brought your mind there.
Got to get to the tough stuff and then make it easier in life and be like, OK, well, I thought about that.
I got past that. But now I don’t have to like have existential crisis as much as much.
Definitely still happens here and there.
But being able to actually think about it, just like how Lucifer presented it within throughout that you got to watch all six seasons.
I know I’m sorry. It’s a lot, but it’s so it’s still so enjoyable throughout the process.
So, yeah, I mean, honestly, I skipped a season, but we can talk about that in the time.
You have to just see where it’s going in the story because they’re like what they present.
And it’s it’s just it’s very profound. They’re very deep thinkers.
Let’s just put it that way. I’m very impressed with good writers.
It’s a lot of sucky ones, but the good ones, I’m very glad they got six seasons to actually tell their full story, because if not, oh, my God, it just.
It would be just it’d be such a shame. Thank you, Netflix.
Anyways, speaking of which, the Netflix commercial is pretty cool. OK, we’ll end it on that.
It is almost oh, my gosh, it’s four fifty four. Another mirror.
It’s almost five in the morning and long story short, sinus infection has kept me that way.
We can talk about that fun stuff, but has me completely awake and asleep at different times of the day.
So I’m gluten free and I can so.
This is just a taste. Hopefully, you still want to listen to me.
The most ironic thing is that actually, like I was so shy that a guy that I liked back in middle schoolish didn’t mean any harm by it.
It’s just very outgoing and said, Elizabeth doesn’t talk, talk, talk, insert name of other person that was here, likes to rock, rock, rock.
He’s talking about playing guitar or something. And it’s haunted me like not even like
to make him feel bad or anything. It just it was very embarrassing on the time, but I didn’t even realize I didn’t talk back then.
I was just so shy. And it’s funny to me because the people in my life now probably would not believe me.
That’s that’s true. That actually did happen. So it’s kind of the irony of this.
And how Lizzie likes to talk a lot, whether you like it or not, here she is. She’s talking.
So I hope that you join in with me and want to still continue to listen to me and my random thoughts.
As I used to say back in my video days, this is as random as it gets.
And hopefully you learn to love it and it can get you out of the comfort zone of always being planned out.
I’ll try to plan as much as I can, but I can’t guarantee it in my head. I’m sorry.
Hopefully we can have some fun with that. OK, good night slash good morning.
I really need to stop doing that–unemployment life. OK, good night.
Thank you.